excuse me while I fall apart

I'm such a lameass creeper, but someone posted this in a quotes section on a forum I read and I thought it was the most hilarious thing I've read in a while.

Him (20:21:44): *unhinges his jaw, eats her sneaky ass alive*
Me (21:08:30): Ew. Too much like those vamps in Blade II.
Him (21:08:39): I never saw that,
Him (21:08:42): period.
Me (21:09:12): Cleft jaws. Even boa constrictors would go ew.
Him (21:09:44): Well I ate you so I don't know how the fuck you're here chatting with me.
Him (21:09:46): Cheater.
Him (21:09:49): Godmoder.
Me (21:10:40): Twink.
Me (21:10:43): Munchkin.
Me (21:10:56): *voids the auto*
Him (21:11:04): You're a gamer!
Him (21:11:08): J'ACCUSE!
Him (21:11:21): *points*
Me (21:11:21): Overruled!
Him (21:11:58): What? Sorry can't hear you while you're being DIGESTED.
Me (21:12:32): You're about to shit bricks.
Me (21:12:40): Actually, scratch that - tarantulas.
Him (21:12:53): Well that sounds awful. What can I do???
Me (21:13:13): Now? Too late!
Him (21:13:29): Wait! Hold on! Wait a second!
Him (21:13:37): What if I didn't eat you at all???
Me (21:14:00): You didn't. The auto was voided, remember?
Me (21:14:06): You botched the vore roll anyway.
Him (21:14:22): Good thing I didn't go for the fish-gutting.
Me (21:15:05): The difficulty of a healing roll for re-emboweling is off the charts.

I'm heading out to Spokane today for a Hollywood Undead concert. It's going to be hot and probably muggy and I'm not looking forward to that particular part, but the rest will be fun. We're driving over, going to the concert, then immediately driving back, so that should be fun too. Many, many hours of driving, right there. Luckily, I don't have to work tomorrow or anything, so I'm not too worried about it.

For the 4th, we're planning on going to the little parade in downtown Kirkland and I'm pretty excited about that. I'm okay with just having a chill 4th, setting off some fireworks, not making a big deal out of it, especially since Mallory's gone.

And Megan is coming back Saturday! Although I probably won't see her until Monday, Sunday if I'm super lucky. I've missed her, so this is pretty exciting for me. Mallory still has like two weeks that she's going to be gone and I feel horrible because so far, she's been really bored and sweaty. I hope that she has more fun over the next few days, gets to see friends and that sort of thing. That's the whole reason she went back, after all.

I am watching The Uninvited. The initial reason I wanted to watch it was mostly because of the adorable miss Emily Browning.
I really think she should have been cast as Bella in the Twilight movies because Kristen Stewart is a horrible person and an even worse actress. Of course, I'm over it by now, but I really wanted to see the movie becaise I loved this girl, particularly in A Series of Unfortunate Events. 

Moving on from that, I've now graduated. I'm officially high school alumni. I never have to step foot in my high school again which is a very, very comforting thought. It also means that I'm done jumping through pointless hoops just to get to graduation. Juanita made me jump through so many damn hoops of fire just to get to the point where I could wear that stupid graduation gown.

Another point is that this now means I'm an adult. A real adult, who has to make decisions that will affect the rest of my life. For a while now, I've been of the opinion that I wasn't anything like most kids my age. Maturity-wise, ambition-wise. I've always wanted... more. Doing Running Start definitely got me more. It got me college when my only other option was high school, which did not fit me at all. It got me free college when college is normally something I'd never be able to afford.

Now there's just the question- what's next?
Well, I desperately want to join the Peace Corps. There's just the matter of whether or not that would work out. I've heard from a few people that getting accepted into the Peace Corps is very difficult. I'm hoping that since I've got so much community service, that'll help me a little. If that doesn't work out, I suppose I'll just go right into schooling. I'm still undecided- nursing or massage therapy? I think I might be pretty set on nursing because the hours and everything would allow me to work on other projects as well, such as volunteering and my photography.

so i have to buy a new car when i get my money in august. my dad thinks he might have found a new engine for marilyn, but i don't know that that's actually going to work.
i went to look on craigslist and found TONS of cars that are really nice and pretty well priced.

i don't have my money yet though. this sucks.
i found a 2004 acura TL for 4000 bucks. what? what?!
90,000 miles or so.
WHAT?!

why don't i have my damn money yet? i want to buy one of these cars.
even more, i want to get my tattoo, but i actually have to wait until i'm 18 for that.

I learned something very big yesterday, about one of my friends. Don't ask me who or what it was, but it was pretty huge, as far as I'm concerned.

This particular thing pretty much blew me away. It was entirely shocking and when I was told, I felt very much in shock. And it sort of scared me.

These huge, monumental things can happen in my friends lives and not only do I not even know that it has happened, but it changes them a lot.

I can't really go into anymore detail than that.

maybe you should really also all click on this.

i think it's a pretty self-explanatory.

i'm gonna have to say that legend of the seeker is my new obsession. i love kahlan and her epic hair.
and legendofseeker is the best community ever. they have a weekly posting about ways that kahlan turns people gay.

i think this is a good example.

my dad's back to work for a week or so! i hope it lasts longer because he interviewed at molbaks, but he makes a lot more money laying foundations than he would working maintenence there.

bad economy sucks.

there's certain people who i'd like to share the world with. the real world, where shit happens and everything isn't perfect and we can ignore it all because of what we look like.

by we, i mean white people. all my white friends and family who don't have to worry about racism and can say 'i know it happens! it happens and i totally get that!' but don't have to do anything about it. because we're white.

and because we're white, we can be ignorant without repurcussion. this country is ours, and we're making a mess of it. not just with politics and the economy, although that's failing miserably too. it's always been there, this white privilege that i have, that all of us white people have. but we've never had to acknowledge it. people of colour have had to, because to not do so is to fail to be 'american', to assimilate and to become like us, like the majority, like white.

to be white is to be right. to be white is to be human and 'american' and proud and patriotic. to be brown or black or yellow or red is to be different, to stand out. to be a person of colour is to be be people who are expected to change, when change should start with the majority.

why can't they change? WHY CAN'T THEY JUST BE MORE LIKE US?

my ancestors have given up every bit of their heritage to be 'american'. they've changed their last names, lost their native tongue, dropped cultural norms and settled down to the warm, embracing arms of america. and it was hard, i'm sure. it was hard to come to a new country and have to change everything about themselves to have the american dream.

but it was also possible. for those people of colour who come from somalia, india, iran, china, the philippines, mexico, ethiopia. they're NEVER going to be 'american' until they breed every bit of colour out of themselves. no matter how perfectly they learn the language, how many years they spend in college, how WHITE they act, they're still brown or black or yellow or red. they're still not like ME.

and for some reason, for some entirely wrong, bad, hateful reason, that means that something is wrong with them. that means that they have to try 100 times as hard to get half as far as i ever will.

do you see? are you getting it?
i'm not playing the race card.
i'm just saying what i know to be true. my personal truths.
does it get to you like it does to me? does it hurt you, and make you feel like this world, this country, is so irrevocably screwed up, that's it's so INGRAINED in our lives and our institutions and our homes that it has to start with us? with those people who don't have to acknowledge their privilege. with white people who can live every day, colour blind to the injustices going on around them.

you have to open your eyes. you have to open your eyes to what's around you and see and acknowledge and think and maybe cry and probably get angry. but you just HAVE to, or else NOTHING is ever going to change. or else when my children hopefully fight this same fight, there will've been no progress yet. i hope they don't have to start off at the same place i do.

'are you calling me fat? are you saying i have so much mass that i have a gravitational pull?'

i love purses and also clearance.
but that's the shallow, cheap teenage girl in me. besides that, i'm watching buffy and it's pleasing to me that it's the weekend.
and my teeth still hurt from the cleaning today, but it's good to know that my wisdom teeth aren't coming in yet, i guess. i'm really not excited for getting them pulled because i hear it hurts like a son of a bitch.

i'll have to go ahead not bother making this really boring by ending hear.
plus i love this heated mattress pad. it's making my life.

i'm so pleased that things are already going well. one of the very FIRST things obama does is to close gitmo and to change bush's policies on omission standards in like, 13 states.

i hope things keep up this way.

both my white culture and my soc of religion classes were diverted to the schools theater to watch the inauguration today. when i walked in, i'd missed the oath but came in on the very beginning of his speech. the theater was jam packed and of the people who were standing around the edges, we were like eight people deep all around.

and of course i cried.
his speech was amazing.
i'm excited for the next 4 years.

and when bush got into his stupid little helicopter and flew off, the theater practically shook with the cheers.

i keep having these weird dreams that baffle and confuse me.
first i was in california and my grandmother lived right near san fransisco bay, which she does not actually, and then i was somewhere, probably in san fransisco and we went on this ride that tied you to this big thing and dunked you in the bay. i don't get it.

somehow, i was then in the uk, but i've no idea where. i just knew we were there and i was driving a boat. just a small one, like a speed boat. we went to some hotel that i guess was boat accessible because we got off the boat and walked right up to the hotel.

then things got weird. mallory and i went to a movie in the hotel and people kept changing seats around us, and then a fight broke out. then people kept stealing each others seats and so we left because it was annoying and we came back a minute later and every seat in the theater was taken.

also, i fell in love with some boy but i can't remember his name only i'm not sure he ever said it in the dream. he looked like that hottie who sits next to me in my white culture class.

and that's it.
i don't even know.

I'm very irritated that Skins is going the way it is. I know that it's not exactly a new thing, the whole WRITING OUT THE WHOLE CAST thing, but I forgot how much I love maxxie and cassie and sid and okay, sometimes even anwar even though he hated on maxxie for being gay for a bit. And chris! Poor chris. :( and jal but secretly I didn't like her much. I loved chris though, and his affair with angie.

I'm seriously gonna miss skins.

these are fic recs for you! all are harry potter because duh, i'm just into hp right now. i have near 500 favourited i think, but these are just the GOOD ones.

Cambiare Podentes: Invocare and its sequel Cambiare Podentes: Madurare. these are both harry/severus.

this is a short darkfic, i guess. And Miles To Go Before I Sleep.

i must enjoy harry/sev! i have a lot of those...
But It's Better If You Do.
and the sequel, It's Best If You Don't.

this totally made me cry. D: Only On Weekends.

A Convenient Marriage. i honestly can't remember much about this one, but it sounds hot, right?! idk, remind me after you read it, haha.

A Fracture of the Mind's Eye. another that looks good but i can't quite remember. D: thought i'd toss it out there.

... i can see a pattern. more harry/sev. Out of Bounds/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9

finally, a harry/draco! Undesirable.

Blue Paste.

i should be awful for loving this fic but. well. i did. (: it's pretty dark though. Control Issues.

i can't remember if this is a sequel or a story on its own. Desperation. and this one is related to that story in some manner. i can't remember how. D: Ten Years Gone.

this made me cry a bit also. >> Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silent.

another harry/sev. The Weight of Water.

Balloon Theory.

yeah, it's about dicks. big ones. (: Big Dick, Come Quick.

and like, the best fic ever! Indago, Indago:Reborn, and Indago:3.

when did the mlk assembly get so close?!

i don't know, but i painted my darkroom this weekend and it's nice and, well, dark. we painted it black, so now all i really have left to do is fix everything up, put all my equipment back in there, hook up the spigot, get my chemicals, hook up my safe light and uhhh i think that's it. i'm almost done with the project but i haven't done ANYTHING on the actual papaer part, with all the crap i have to turn in. man, i need to catch up with that.